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 | By Molly Snyder Edler   OnMilwaukee.com Staff Writer E-mail author | Author bio More articles by Molly Snyder Edler |
| Published April 23, 2009 at 9:34 a.m. |
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My kid has gone through some interesting phases. For a while, he only wanted turkey dogs for breakfast. Then he added "mi olde" to everything, like "Mom, where's mi olde soccer ball?" And recently, he started greeting people he's meeting for the first time with, "I'm Kai. I'm adopted."
Yesterday, a nurse stopped by our house to take our blood and urine for a new insurance policy, and Kai met her at the door with, "I'm Kai. I'm adopted, so I wasn't born."
("Kai," my husband said. "Everyone was born.")
People really don't know how to respond to my son's new greeting. They usually get a slightly soft, concerned look on their face in recognition that even the healthiest adoption still symbolizes loss.
However, my husband and I know our son is proud of being adopted, and that is why he tells people this tidbit of personal info right off the bat. We know that at some point he will most likely struggle with the absence of his birth parents, but for now, he thinks it's pretty cool. And so do we.
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5 comments about this article. Post a comment / write a review. |
Recent Talkbacks ...
Posted by Molly Snyder Edler on April 23, 2009 at 1:31 p.m. (report)
As an adoptive parent, I can understand why previous generations of adoptive parents didn't want their child to say he or she is adopted even though I personally would never do that. Most adoptive parents just really want to be the "real" and only mom or dad. Luckily for the kids, modern adoption is so different -- it's more open -- and about finding out as much as you can and discussing it from day one in age-appropriate ways.
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Posted by KGZ on April 23, 2009 at 12:04 p.m. (report)
Yeah. Me too. It's weird for sure. pretty much only gets worse when you get to college and start meeting lots of ppl. you'd be surprised how often I get asked what nationality I am. to which I usually respond, adopted, none, or wisconsin... That, and I can't seem to get a passport, as apparently my birth cert isn't valid. Oh, and the doctors seem to blame every single medical issue i've ever had on genetics. (easy to do when the family history is N/A) Unfortunately, after 25 years, I don't really have any answers... it's just weird.
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Posted by brunocarlson on April 23, 2009 at 11:37 a.m. (report)
My parents would get upset when I would tell my friends at school that I was adopted. I was doing this between Kindergarten and 3rd grade, but how was I to know the social aspect of it. It helped me later in life to be open about it at a young age.
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Posted by angelich on April 23, 2009 at 10:47 a.m. (report)
That's cute. It's not like he's saying it like he's disappointed or anything. (like he could be). My mom likes to tell me the story of how I greeted people and introduced her as "this is my Filipino mommy"
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Posted by rob on April 23, 2009 at 9:38 a.m. (report)
And so does his grandparents on all sides!!!!!
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