Memoirs of a bartender
"Bar Month" at OnMilwaukee.com – brought to you by Hornitos, OR-G, Party Armor, Red Stag, Absolut, Fireball and Malibu – is back for another round! The whole month of February, we're serving up intoxicatingly fun articles on bars and clubs – including guides, the latest trends, bar reviews and more. Grab a designated driver and dive in!
Bar month has me gooey and nostalgic over a really great time in my life.
All too long ago ... in actuality (gulp) an entire decade heretofore ... I was in the throes of the service industry, living life as a Milwaukee bartender. The years spent slinging booze behind the bar are some of the fondest, most carefree, and lucrative of my life.
For a girl who never touched alcohol before a tenure at Marquette University as a student and consequently a patron at Theo's (rest that bar's lovely soul), I adapted to multitasking poppin' bottles and doin' shots with very little grace, and even less dexterity.
I was fortunate enough that my dear friend, William Jenkins, bestowed my very first barkeep position upon me, although my resume was a barren wasteland in terms of mixology. I eagerly learned the ropes at the beloved Cush and was promptly put onto the busiest shifts: Fridays, Saturdays and (I know a lot of you miss Cush's SIN) Sundays.
If you weren't a "drinker" before, walking through the doors of Cush would change that; probably with a shot of Jack Daniels procured through a game of bar dice. I am flummoxed that I can still palate Patron or Jaeger subsequent to my residence there. I have also, to this day, never had as much unquestionable fun at any establishment since. I sincerely loved my boss, my co-workers and our guests – even the ones I cursed at.
I was not a "nice" bartender by any means. I did not have a talent for remembering slews of drinks, nor mixing particularly tasty concoctions. But, I could remove beer bottle caps (with a bottle cap opener kept holstered in the back pocket of my painted-on pants so strictly it would create a permanent imprint and ultimately excavate the denim) and pour long islands, shake a decent cosmo and deal Jaeger bombs swiftly while wearing a low-cut tank top and spouting banter/yelling.
Almost immediately, I began to prefer working instead of going out socially. I felt protected by the barrier of the bar, empowered by its barricade. I worked my tail off, but still felt like I had partied. And, instead of coming home empty-handed, I had a wad of cash in my young fist, which eventually even bought me a condo on Prospect Avenue with a slight view of the lake.
I would close each shift with the bottom of my jeans and boots soaked through with a melange of melted ice, beer, cocktails and who really knows what else. I remember faintly smelling of a strange blend of alcohol at all times from marinating in the blend every night. My feet and lower back would ache from the hours standing and the occasional lugging of ice buckets or a case of beers up a flight of stairs.
Eventually, my body couldn't take it anymore. "It," being the late nights and general physical demands of the job. I decided to bow to my insufficiencies and pursue a life of daytime hours.
Every time I pull up a stool or push my way through a sea of people to order beverages, I take a moment to appreciate those fine people behind the majestic barrier that is my favorite bar or chosen venue. It takes a special breed to serve in the places "where everybody knows your name."
So, I tip. And I do it generously as a way of paying tribute to those glorious years spent pouring hooch.
And although I sometimes feel the beer taps summoning me to hurdle the bar, I have decided that there is no way of reliving those years. But, I will forever be a bartender at heart – a bartender made in Milwaukee.
Talkbacks
college_dave | Feb. 25, 2012 at 10:49 p.m. (report)
Another great story, L. I just read this after bartending a super busy dinner shift. I've been at this for 20 years now, and you hit it on the head when you mention the actual physical labour of it. My legs are SORE.
| Rate this: |
![]() |
2 comments about this article. Post your comment/review now |
Facebook comments
Disclaimer: Please note that Facebook comments are posted through Facebook and cannot be approved, edited or declined by OnMilwaukee.com. The opinions expressed in Facebook comments do not necessarily reflect those of OnMilwaukee.com or its staff.
Recent Articles & Blogs by Lindsay Garric
Girly skrillex
Published June 18, 2013
Ever the Madonna-esque fashion chameleon, Lindsay takes the plunge and goes in for the trendy half-shorn Skrillex haircut.
Catching up with Trophy Straps
Published June 7, 2013
Wisconsin has bred some of music's most creative innovators. Included in this group is Greendale's Glenn Boren, proprietor and designer of Trophy Straps, a company that locally manufactures instrument straps. These straps are so strongly tied to Wisco that their flagship straps have ends made from the same leather used in Harley motorcycle seats.
Ballet Beautiful
Published May 24, 2013
After two weeks of teeth-gritting exercise courtesy of Mary Helen Bowers' "Ballet Beautiful" DVDs, I now see that ballet dancers are warriors on pointe.
Let's split it
Published May 14, 2013
There's been a lot of travel in our family since March, which means the fridge is more of a barren cavern than stocked with it's usual bounty of healthy fare. So, by default and out of admitted laziness, we've been enjoying more meals "out," than are typical for us. So, how are we avoiding the major ouch in our pocketbook and around our waistlines? Well, we're splitting entrees.
Get naked at the Korean spa
Published April 29, 2013
I took part in a beauty ritual of the Korean Day Space in Oahu before a red-eye home. The experience not only beautified my outside, but did something powerful to my self-awareness and self-esteem, too. And did I mention I was completely naked the entire time?
Hop on board the pineapple express
Published April 15, 2013
Current trends in nutrition preach the benefits of eating a seasonal diet in accordance with where you live. Eating papaya in February in Wisconsin doesn't exactly jibe with this. But, sometimes cravings win out. In complete rebellion against seasonal or local eating, I have been indulging in some major pineapple action.
Hearing vs. seeing...on Facebook
Published March 29, 2013
We don't "hear" about anything anymore. We "see" it all...on Facebook. Is there still such a thing as a "catch-up" between old friends? Is there any mystery left?
I'm a Google (or, at least, I was)
Published March 13, 2013
Lindsay was a devoted Google user. But a nasty case of texting thumb lured her to the world of Apple and its one-fingered touchscreen and often infuriating loopholes.
15 wardrobe essentials to prevent fashion disaster
Published Feb. 28, 2013
My wardrobe is overwhelming me. Too many choices inevitably leads to a fashion disaster. So I queried some of Milwaukee's most influential style mavens for their advice. If they could only have 15 pieces in their entire wardrobe, what would it come down to?
Barter your way to a better life
Published Feb. 4, 2013
If you want it or need it, God knows it's gotta be on Craigslist. I think of it as another way to save money, to consume less, to recycle and reuse. For all of that and a feeling of camaraderie with my fellow penny pincher, the shining star of the 'List is the "Barter" area.
Like Us
Follow Us













