I always knew there were blind spots in my parenting scope, but lately, they have been extremely visible. I just hope there are plenty of sensitive, inquisitive young folks out there who are going to make fine future therapists because my kid's gonna need one.
Here are five things that happened recently that suggest my parenting license should be revoked:
1. My son was invited on court with the Harlem Globetrotters to do the "YMCA" dance and he did not know how to do it. Where are my priorities? Didn't I coin the phrase "It Takes The Village People To Raise A Child?" And didn't I work at the YMCA for 12 years?
2. He is 8 and still thinks words like "appropriated" (as a synonym for "suitable") and "unihorn" exist because I do not correct him. That's right, I am holding on to the last shreds of his baby-ness like the selfish maternal figure that I am. And "unihorn" is more accurate anyway. The magical horse has one horn, not one corn, right?
3. He's in a latch hook club. With me. That I started. What is wrong with me? I must have the locker picked out that I want him to be stuffed into someday when he's 13 and someone finds out he is or was in a latch hook club with his mother. What next? A Happy Hands Dance Club with his dad?
4. He put his jeans on backwards today and did not notice. As much as I would like to think of this as fashion forward, it's most likely more in the "fashion failure" category. Why would anyone accept a butt zipper?
5. He wants to be a "computer writer" someday and write articles about Milwaukee.
No Talkbacks for this article.
Post your comment/review now
Disclaimer: Please note that Facebook comments are posted through Facebook and cannot be approved, edited or declined by OnMilwaukee.com. The opinions expressed in Facebook comments do not necessarily reflect those of OnMilwaukee.com or its staff.
Recent Articles & Blogs by Molly Snyder
Published Dec. 12, 2013
Despite the fact she had never taken a ballet class in her life, OnMilwaukee.com's Molly Snyder could not resist the opportunity to play an extra in the Milwaukee Ballet's "The Nutcracker," especially once the marketing director assured her neither tutus nor dance skills were required.
Published Dec. 11, 2013
Tonight we drove through Country Christmas at Country Springs. We had been to Candy Cane Lane, but never Country Christmas which is on the grounds of the Country Springs Hotel in Pewaukee.
Published Dec. 11, 2013
It's hard to believe 2013 is almost over, and looking back, it wasn't Molly's favorite year of all time, but it certainly contained some fine entertainment moments.
Published Dec. 10, 2013
Once again, Milwaukee was recently ranked as the overall most segregated metropolitan area in the United States. This is something most of us would like to see change, and one way to do this is to recognize and support the truly diverse establishments in the city. Jo's Cafe, 3518 W. Silver Spring Dr., is one of these places.
Published Dec. 9, 2013
Next month, Rio West Cantina, 2730 N. Humboldt Blvd., will become the Milwauke Beer Bistro.
Published Dec. 8, 2013
After more than two decades as the national CEO of Public Allies, Paul Schmitz is moving on. But luckily for Milwaukee, he's not moving out.
Published Dec. 7, 2013
During a recent visit to the Hunger Task Force, we spoke with executive director Sherrie Tussler about homelessness, hunger, volunteerism, children, advocacy and dignity. We also talked about bizarre-to-us British canned goods and agreed that Twinkies are not food.
Published Dec. 5, 2013
Perhaps the coolest part of staying at a hotel built inside a former brewery is that it really feels like you're staying at a hotel built inside a former brewery. From the moment we walked into the Brewhouse Inn Suites - in the former Pabst brewhouse - we were swept up in brewing history.
Published Dec. 4, 2013
Brady Street will once again get in on the Festivus action on Saturday, Dec. 7 and attendees will have a chance to air their grievances and participate in feats of strength in an effort to win the highly coveted Festivus pole.
Published Dec. 3, 2013
Splash Studio in the Third Ward announced today that it is in the process of expanding and will more than double the size of the space.