I made a terrible mistake recently and broke one of the karmic codes of parenting by "bragging" about something. I know better than to say these things aloud; they always bite me in the non-mom-jean-wearing butt.
And yet, I can't seem to keep my big mom mouth zipped.
Here's a description of my mama no-no, along with a couple more things you'll never hear me say. Of course there are way more than three things a parent should never say,¬†so feel free to add more via the Talkback feature.
1.¬†A couple weeks ago, I actually told a friend how lucky my family has been in avoiding sickness. I even went so far to say it had been over a year since the yucks struck. And I did not knock on wood. Or acknowledge my boldness to the universe. I just kept rollin' along for a few days and then blammo. We all got sick as goats (I thought I'd leave dogs out of this expression for once) and have remained fevery / sneezy / pukey ever since.
2. I used to say how my kids would eat "anything." And it was true: from seaweed to salmon to sauerkraut, they ravenously consumed whatever I plopped on their dumb little penguin plates. And then, around six or seven, they became super picky. ¬†Like "I really only want juice and noodles" picky. We are slowly working our way back from the depths of insane food scrutiny, but I often chortle sinisterly at the memory of my former food statements.
3. We don't have a TV or video games in our house and even though here I am telling all of you in Blogland, you will never hear me say these words aloud. Ever. Because no matter how I say it, it makes other parents really uncomfortable. They feel the need to say things like, "Well we barely watch any TV..." and I totally understand why they go there. But the fact is, I made this choice for me. It has nothing to do with thinking my kids are going to achieve world peace and your kids are going to work in a pickle factory, it's a complicated, personal choice that doesn't work for everyone. But I promise, I'll keep it to myself. You couldn't beat it out of me with an old rabbit ears antenna.
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