Hello out there in reader land. They say "what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas". I say let me tell you what happened in Vegas.

My friend and I boarded our plane to Vegas with excitement in the air. We were heading to the annual Vegoose Music festival. The yearly festival takes place around halloween in Las Vegas at the site of the UNLV football stadium. Musicly it was a hodge-podge with acts ranging from Fiona Apple to Widespread Panic to G-Love to Jurrassic 5. We however were headed out there waiting to see our personal favorites like Keller Williams and Yonder Mountain String Band, but were quite pleased with some of the other shows we saw. I'll tell you about all of that later, but for now lets start at day one.

DAY ONE: We arrived in Vegas just in time. My friend was about to punch me in the face on the plane ride because I wouldn't stop singing "Viva Las Vegas". We got off the plane and quickly cabbed it to the MGM Grand. If you haven't been there it is amazing. They have lions in the lobby in a little habitat type thing. I think lions are their trademark, because they had lion symbols everywhere. Luckily we had booked our trip well ahead of time through one of the internet hotel things like Expedia or something, and we got the flight and the hotel for 100 bucks a night. It was sweet. The first night, Friday, we saw Keller Williams at the house of blues. It was one of the best Keller shows I had ever seen. Possibly the best part of the show, and the best part of Vegas is that there is no "open container" policy. What that means is you can order a drink in one of the hotels, and then just walk outside, and walk down the street drinking it. It's amazing. We bought a bottle of Jack Daniels and just walked around pulling from it.

DAY TWO: Woke up a little groggy. We got in a cab and asked the cabbie where the best buffet was. He said that a lot of people think the Paris is the best bang for your buck, so we went there. It was amazing, prime rib, crab legs, 50 cheeses, baguettes, and 25 desserts. We ate our faces off, and headed back to our hotel to prepare for day one of the festival. We were heading to the grounds around 5pm, so this lunch buffet was a nice base. Right as we turned the corner from the Paris buffet towards the lobby I saw a GOAT, wait the GOAT, The Greatest Of All Time that is .... Jerry Rice. No one recognized him. He isnt very big, but it was f-ing Jerry Rice. I recognized him and almost soiled myself. It was pretty sweet. Anyway, where was I... Oh yes teh festival. Saturday we saw Yonder Mountain String Band, Keller Williams w/ String Cheese Incident, and at night Phil Lesh and Trey Anastasio. It was a grueling 8 hours of dancing like you are on a ton of drugs... hippies man. I do love the music though. After the show we went back to our hotel to prepare for the Late Night show of the day. It was String Cheese Incident. If you don't know String Cheese is kind of a strange jam band with bluegrass influences. They all came out dressed as gorillas, because of halloween. I think the guy next to me thought he was hallucinating the gorillas, but they were there. The night ended, and we went home and passed out.  

DAY THREE: We went back to the festival and saw Tom Petty, G-Love, and Widespread Panic. It was a good time. I ate one of those giant turkey legs. You know what im talking about. I felt like I needed a mullet just to order one, but I just couldn't resist the majesty of the giant leg. That night we saw Phil and Trey for the late night show. You would think that two of the bigger names in the genre would make for a great show, but to be honest it was probably the worst of the trip. After the show we headed home and prepared for Monday our first day of gambling... boy did that go well.

DAY FOUR: We woke up and decided it was time to gamble. We went to the old strip, freemont street, where the gambling is a bit cheeper. In Vegas the main strip with all the big hotels generally has higher limit tables for almost all of the gambling games. Freemont, which is known for its overhead light show, has a lot lower limit tables. We played a little roulette, my friend played some blackjack, and I hit the slots. I actually played in one poker tourney it was a ten man sit and go, $30 entry. I got third and missed out on the money. It was a terrible beat. I was a near lock and the guy hit the river. "That's no-limit baby".

Anyway the slots is where it got interesting. I immediately won $125 at a quarter slot machine. Then I went to the nickel slots. I hit the jackpot. The siren on the top of the machine went off, and the old lady next to me almost soiled her depends. The casino staff cam and paid me my 3200 nickels, or $162. So now after all my winnings I had a little over $300 burning a hole in my pocket. It was dinner time, and I wanted to have a $300 dinner for me and my buddy. We asked around, but really couldnt find anywhere we wanted to go. This stripper who was trying to get us to come into her club was like, "You want to spend $300 on dinner? You should come in here". I was like, "Eh... I haven't had all my immunizations I'll pass". We ended up at the MGM grand dining room where we had Surf and Turf and a bottle of red wine. It was fantastic. It was now about 10 o'clock, and time for our final late night show. This time it was Widespread Panic, and it was in our hotel... oh yeah, and it was halloween. All the hippies were in costume. The show was good, and when it ended it was one of the greatest scenes ever. All these gamblers in the MGM grand were instantly bombarded by a parade of costumed hippies. My buddy and I decided it was bed-time since we had an early flight the next day. We got to the room, and I had $20 left in my pocket. I said, "let's go downstairs, ill blow this 20 and then we can sleep, so we did. Except I didn't blow the 20... I put it in a slot and won $1,000... we instantly went to the bar, and I said to the bar tender "ill have three shots of your finest whiskey, a 7 and 7, and a Kettle One Vodka Gimlet"... the cost $210... each shot was $50... oh well i was still up. We drank and drank and you know what happens next....

DAY FIVE: We overslept. When we finally woke up the line to get a cab was 50 people deep. We did the only thing we could and chartered a stretch hummer limo to take us to the airport. It was great and it only cost $60. We made it just in time, and I passed out instantly on the plane. Vegas was great, but I think I lost 3-4 years off the end of my life. Winning in Vegas has to be the best vacation a person could have. Losing on the other hand.... well it probably sucks.