Tips from the Masters
I roll with a crew of likeminded gents. We range in age from 28 (puppy) to 47 (wily veteran) and though a few of us have made the cardinal player sin of tying the knot, most of us have remainder staunchly single our entire lives. We live the player life--meeting women, dating them, having our fun, and then moving on to the next one. Most women object to this, but some are longer term propositions.
My fellow player Jorge mentioned that we should compile some stats and best practices and see about a reality television show. That's unrealistic, but to the young, wanna be players out there on the scene, we'll offer some sage advice via this blog space.
Your journey starts here, grasshoppers. Take notes, refer back often, and post any questions below. The four leaders of the rack attack pack will get back to you in between hottie scoring sessions.
The first and foremost rule of being a total player is that you must get over any fear of rejection. The old adage the "bees and dogs can smell fear" should also include single women. If you don't roll on up full on confidence and sort of a carefree attitude with regard to whether or not she takes the bait, you best not venture out.
If you haven't yet mastered this step (and few have) our advice is to start approaching women in bars, at the grocery store, out in the park--anywhere! Don't approach women at the gym, but virtually anywhere else is fine. Strike up on a conversation. Don't lead with a compliment, lead with a smile and something safe in the way of conversation. Eventually, you'll be comfortable talking to anyone, regardless of his/her position or looks. You'll know this when it happens because your friends will comment and ask you how you do it. Trust us, this is the most important element.
Shine your shoes, skip the t-shirt, never wear a hat or cap, and make sure that everything you wear is pressed and clean. Learn to pair colors subtly and take a flyer on something like socks of a tie, not on an orange button down shirt. If you aren't Tyson Beckford, you can't pull off an orange shirt, my boy.
Get things tailored so that they fit you, not the rack that they were on when you picked them up at J.C. Penney or Kohl's. Spend more on a few nice duds instead of filling a closet full of junk. The only time that quantity beats quality is with the ladies!
We hear guys bellyaching all the time about the lack of available women here in Milwaukee. That's just blasphemy! There are hotties all over this town! We don't endorse any particular establishments, but right now, The Whiskey Bar and all things at The Iron Horse Hotel are ripe for the picking! Get out there!
We've all done the online thing, too, with good results. You get all sorts of women on the free sites like Craigslist, so be mindful of that. There are scam artists galore. Match.com is better, eHarmony is a joke. If you just want a woman for nighttime pursuits, we recommend AdultFriendFinder/Passion.com. If you swing, LifeStyleLounge is the place to be.
When doing the online dating thing, put your best foot forward, but don't lie. Remember, most people write their profiles the way that they want to be, not the way they actually are. A little embellishment is fine, but always tell the truth and post your BEST photos--and "best" doesn't ever involve a kid, dog, boat, motorcycle, or dead animal. Enough said.
Players never take phone calls. I repeat: true players NEVER take phone calls. You have to play hard to get and harder to get ahold of with women. Be mysterious, be busy, and make them think that you are always out and about with other talent.
You should also get a Google Voice number and forward that to your cell phone. Use the Google number to call and text the ladies, that way you can ditch the Google number or call filter it per girl if they get clingy or weird...and a lot of them do. Never, ever, ever give out your real phone number to a woman unless she having your baby or will be your bride, and even then, neither is a given.
The Meet Up
Have lunch or an after work drink as your first date. You spend less time and less money than a formal dinner, and it gives you both a chance to bolt if there is no chemistry.
If that goes well, see her again within one week, preferably within three days. You need momentum to close the deal! The second date should be slightly more formal than the first, but not fine dining and a theater event. Have a nice dinner (somewhere ethnic, let her pick the cuisine and you pick the restaurant) then have a drink somewhere that she likes. Never order for her.
If she doesn't invite you up and come back to your place on the second date, only see her again if she's either a) really, really hot, or b) someone you might like to date in the longer term. If you find a lot of the latter, you aren't a player...you're a normal dude, which is fine, just quit trying to be something that you aren't, man!
Never give her your credit card number, house key, or car key. Wear protection. Don't go down on her.
Heaven for a player is to get 3-4 women that are habitually single, hot, good in bed, and willing to be a booty call on an infrequent basis. If you can pull this off, your life will be grand and you will be the envy of all men. This happens, when it happens, completely organically. You can't force the issue.
The best way to become a proper player is to hang out with other players. Some guys are competitive about hot women, but true players are always genuinely happy to see another man getting what he wants from an attractive philly. If you find guys who want to steal your prey, those aren't friends and those aren't players, those guys are jerks. Stay away. Hang with true players and learn from the best. Find a sort of mentor if you can.
Lastly, you have to venture all over town to meet talent and to avoid old flames. Get out there, all over town and even in the (gasp) burbs. You won't regret it. Sometimes, hot divorcees are a nice diversion for a while!
Some of you may be repulsed by this blog or the activities and tactics mentioned herein. That's fine, and you are entitled to your opinion, just like we are entitled to ours. We choose to live free.