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Readers Blog: Dobie Maxwell's 'Dented Can' Diary

Forward, March

Monday March 14th, 2011 - Fox Lake, IL/Racine, WI

   Another birthday, and since I can’t stop them from coming I might as well find as many ways to enjoy them as I can. Yeah, I’m getting older - but so is everyone else. I’m not the first person to be in this position and I won’t be the last. For the immediate future, I am in a position to do whatever it is I’m going to do in this life. I am in my prime creative time.

   I’ve got some life experience behind me, and still at least a little gas in the tank, so now it’s a matter of seeing how far I can make that tank go before I’m too old or too worn out to get anything done. It’s a giant race against the clock, like a 4th quarter drive in football.

   What’s my touchdown? It’s a lot different now than it was, and I never had a clear idea of what it was before. I guess I thought it would work itself out, which of course it didn’t. Now I realize I have to put the image in my own head and go make it happen from there.

   I’m fine with it, and am up for the challenge. I love challenges, and for the first time in my life I feel like I’ve got some sort of plan in place. I want to find something I love that pays enough for me to build a nest egg to live comfortably should I need to stop working for whatever reason. I don’t need a mansion, I just want to be able to live like a human.

   I’ve spent my life in basements, cheap motels and filthy comedy condos. I don’t think a modest town house at some point would be out of my league. I don’t need anything other than a clean place to stay in a nice area. I’ve spent enough years living like a cockroach.

   Sometimes I get a little down, and sometimes I get off track, but in all honesty I’m on a very positive path right now. My health is pretty good, considering I’ve neglected it for all these years. Plain and simple, that has to stop. Immediately. I know I keep saying that, but now it’s true. One can eat so much lard, sugar and pork before one’s heart pops like a zit.

   I need to stretch. I need to exercise. I need to drink more water. I need to cut soda out of my life forever. I need to eat healthier. I need to drop significant tonnage. This is difficult and not able to be done in a week or a month or even a year. I need to make big changes.

   That’s got nothing to do with how I spend the rest of my days. I have a wonderful group of friends and associates to choose from, and I truly believe I have all the ingredients for a dream life if I’ll just put it together. I’m nothing more than the arranger, and will mix and match people’s strengths and talents to get the best results for the group. That takes effort.

   I want to give this next year my maximum effort. I don’t think I’ve ever done that up to my standards before, which are way higher than anyone else’s for me. I want to do things right, have a plan and execute it all the way to completion. I want to score a touchdown.

   And, I want to build a team of diverse talented creative types of all kinds that will have fun playing along with me. I want to become a comedic version of Berry Gordy or George Clinton, who headed a group of creative types and talents and got the most out of them.

   That’s the plan for the year. As for today, it was a flat out fantastic birthday. I’m still on a high from the fun radio show last night with the house full of fun company. Shelley did a wonderful job of making it a memorable evening and it truly was an unexpected treat.

   Today it continued with almost 1000 emails and Face book greetings from people from all walks of my life from comedy to radio to collecting to women I like to friends I’ve had for years and years. I even had some fans wish me a happy ‘pi day’, which it is - (3.14).

   This was not only unbelievably flattering, it also really put into perspective the odds of people I get along with to wank poles I can’t stand. There are maybe ten or a dozen idiots goofs I don’t want to deal with under any circumstances vs. all those I heard from today.

   And just because someone didn’t wish me a happy birthday doesn’t mean they’re sworn enemies. There are a lot more people I can tolerate than the few pukes I can’t. That hit me in the face when I saw those emails piling up all day, and it made me feel good about how I’ve handled the leakers. Why do I have to deal with them at all? I don’t. Good riddance.

   I’m sure people are going to do that to me too, and they have. My siblings are a flaming example, but that’s a family squabble thing. I don’t count them on my ‘dirty dozen dufus’ list. They’re not going to talk to me, and that’s it. I send them love and am moving ahead.

   My friend Russ Martin bought me lunch today at the Iron Skillet Truck Stop in Racine, WI on Highway 20 and I-94. Russ has helped me by recording some ‘Schlitz Happened’ shows and gave me a DVD which I can give to Marc Schultz to cut up for the website.

  After that I took a lap in the thrift store in Waukegan on Highway 132 which is one of the best I’ve ever seen. I also took a lap in the Gurnee Mills Mall. It felt good to get out and exercise, and I also bought myself some DVDs to watch and two new baseball caps that say ‘King of Uranus’ on them just because it was my birthday and I treated myself.

   I stopped at my storage bin and removed a box of business and mail order books I’d put in a place where I could easily find them. Those are what I need to bury myself in for the next few months and get ideas to get Uranus Factory Outlet going. I’m putting it in gear.

   The woman I rent my living space from bought me dinner tonight at The Olive Garden not far from where we live. I didn’t even know it was there. It was a chance to hang out a little, since I haven’t done that since I moved in last December. We enjoyed ourselves.

  Yes, I want to build a business and make a wad of cash and all that, but I also want a fun life in there somewhere too. Traveling was great, but I missed out on a lot of the ‘normal’ side of life. I’d like to have a few bites of that for a while. I’m excited about the next year.

   Hopefully I can salvage a life I’ll be proud of after coming from where I did. That was a bad scene all around, and thankfully most of them are dead now. Why should I wallow in that years later? I want a satisfying fun life surrounded by winners. Forward - MARCH!

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