By Jimmy Carlton Sportswriter Published May 18, 2016 at 3:01 PM

Damn you, Ben Zobrist.

Chase Anderson was so close. The Brewers were so close. Heck, we were so close, us fans, after nearly three decades of watching pitching that’s alternated mostly between eminently crushable and sporadically mediocre, to having that elusive, alluring, magical-night-of-pure-dominance baseball experience. At long last, we’d once again get to see a no-hitter.

Damn you, Ben Zobrist.

But then really damn you, Jason Heyward. And immediately subsequent though historically insignificant, Kris Bryant. Damn you too, man. 

Uncharacteristically cruising on Tuesday night, Anderson took a no-hitter into the eighth inning, retiring potent Cubs batters, benefiting from terrific defense (hat tip, Kirk Nieuwenhuis) and silencing invading Chicago fans at Miller Park, striking out six and walking one as Milwaukee built a 4-0 lead. It was by far the best start of the season for Anderson, who hadn’t won since April 8, and the best of his three-year career – better than a June outing in 2015 with Arizona when he took a no-no into the seventh inning.

It was a soothing balm for a battered rotation that’s been statistically the worst in the majors this season.

But then Zobrist – a former Northwoods League Wisconsin Woodchucks player known more for his high walk rate and defensive versatility than for shattering dreams – had to go and abruptly end all the excitement on the first pitch of the eighth with a leadoff double to deep center field. The quest for hitless history was ended. And if you don’t think teams and fan bases imbue no-hitters with a weird and predictably baseball-ish holiness, you don’t remember how the Mets collectively lost their minds when Johan Santana gave them their first one in 2012.

The Brewers haven’t had a no-no since April 15, 1987, when Juan Nieves recorded their first and only one by stymieing the Orioles. The club's 29-year drought is the second-longest in the big leagues, shorter among active teams than only the Padres, who have never thrown one. Cubs ace Jake Arrieta – a 26th-round draft pick by Milwaukee in 2005 that never signed, sigh – has more no-hitters in the last two seasons than the Brewers have in their franchise history.

Still, there was yet a chance for a somewhat lesser but also impressive achievement for Anderson. Milwaukee hasn’t had even a complete-game one-hitter since Aug. 31, 2008 against the Pirates, when CC Sabathia threw the best of the seven – seven! – complete games he had in three months with the Brewers. The one-hit completer was still on the table.

And after Zobrist’s dumb double, Anderson collected himself in the eighth and sat down the next three Chicago batters to end the inning without damage. He then got the first two outs of the ninth, which brought up Heyward, a former Cardinal and current Cub and thus just the worst, who took two strikes. Needing just one more good pitch to clinch the complete-game, one-hit shutout, Anderson instead served up a meatball that Heyward scarfed down and sent into the right-field bleachers for a deflating solo home run, his first of 2016.

One strike away!

Zobrist ended the no-hit bid, but considering Anderson entered the game with a 6.11 ERA, maybe that all-time feat of pitching supremacy just wasn’t destined for him. But he at least deserved the complete-game one-hitter. And he deserved to be able to finish the night. And Heyward – again, a former St. Louis Cardinal who signed a $184 million contract in the offseason, which c’mon – ruined it all. That’s why Heyward is the real villain here.

Damn you, Jason Heyward.

Anyway, then Kris Bryant homered, and the back-to-back bombs, which made it 4-2 and had Brewers Twitter groaning, ended Anderson’s outing. He was removed, closer Jeremy Jeffress entered and struck out Anthony Rizzo, ending Milwaukee's seven-game home losing streak against Chicago.

On Wednesday night, Jimmy Nelson and the Brewers, who still possess the worst starting staff in the majors, take on John Lackey and Cubs, who still lead the National League in offense. Should be fun!

Born in Milwaukee but a product of Shorewood High School (go ‘Hounds!) and Northwestern University (go ‘Cats!), Jimmy never knew the schoolboy bliss of cheering for a winning football, basketball or baseball team. So he ditched being a fan in order to cover sports professionally - occasionally objectively, always passionately. He's lived in Chicago, New York and Dallas, but now resides again in his beloved Brew City and is an ardent attacker of the notorious Milwaukee Inferiority Complex.

After interning at print publications like Birds and Blooms (official motto: "America's #1 backyard birding and gardening magazine!"), Sports Illustrated (unofficial motto: "Subscribe and save up to 90% off the cover price!") and The Dallas Morning News (a newspaper!), Jimmy worked for web outlets like CBSSports.com, where he was a Packers beat reporter, and FOX Sports Wisconsin, where he managed digital content. He's a proponent and frequent user of em dashes, parenthetical asides, descriptive appositives and, really, anything that makes his sentences longer and more needlessly complex.

Jimmy appreciates references to late '90s Brewers and Bucks players and is the curator of the unofficial John Jaha Hall of Fame. He also enjoys running, biking and soccer, but isn't too annoying about them. He writes about sports - both mainstream and unconventional - and non-sports, including history, music, food, art and even golf (just kidding!), and welcomes reader suggestions for off-the-beaten-path story ideas.