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In Sports
Handicapping the (candy) Bowl Championship Series
How about a playoff system to determine the best candy?  
By Steve Czaban RSS Feed
Special to OnMilwaukee.com

E-mail author | Author bio
More articles by Steve Czaban

Published Oct. 31, 2007 at 5:27 a.m.
Tags: bcs, candy, halloween, bit o' honey, twix, snickers, peanut butter cups, snickers, spree, mike & ike, hot tamales, kit kat, nerds, 100 grand bar, starburst

(page 2)

14. Hawaii (Pop Rocks)
Oh sure, they are a laugh riot when you first try them. "Hey Mom! Listen to my mouth!" But not an everyday candy. Just like Hawaii's football. Hilarious when you are taking the "over" 92.5 and not even sweating it. But sorta stupid to root for when you think about it.

15. Texas (100 Grand Bar)
You gotta have a candy that matches the average payout for an offensive starter over four years in Austin.

16. Auburn (Hershey's Crackle)
This is the exact same bar as the Crunch, but they swear theirs is so much better. To outsiders, it's hard to tell the difference.

17. Alabama (Nestle's Crunch)
See above.

18. South Florida (Smores bar)
An enticing newcomer to the candy scene. Nice mix of ingredients, and very satisfying. But does it have staying power to challenge the big vending machine boys in the future? Only time will tell.

19. USC (Twix)
A classic, classic, candy, with a near perfect mix of ingredients. A candy bar that will always be in "consideration" when you choose a champion at lunch time at your break room snack machine.

20. Florida (Starburst)
Packs a powerful sugary wollop to your taste buds in a compact form. Flavors are light, sweet, and fruity. Perfect for a sunshine state team.

21. Wisconsin (Twizzlers)
This candy won't fool you. It's coming right at you, with a basic taste, a meaty chew, and unmistakable all-red uniform scheme.

22. Boise State (Bottle Caps)
One of the most under-rated candies ever. Yet how come it is not stocked as a regular treat in 7-11's? I tell ya, no respect. Maybe it's the gimmicky "Bottle Cap" shape of the candy -- not unlike a blue Astroturf field -- that is cheating this candy of respect.

23. Virginia (Whoppers)
On the outside, they look like a substantial candy. But once past the soft chocolate shell, the guts of this candy melts away faster than you can say "Independence Bowl."

24. Wake Forest (Butterfinger)
This candy bar was never, ever a good idea. Brittle peanut butter innards, that make an ungodly mess when bit into. Remnants stay lodged in teeth until next dental visit. Again, why is Wake Forest playing football?

25. Clemson (Raisinettes)
In a limited way, this does remain a "power" and "tradition" candy. You can pretty much find it in every movie house. Still, I never understood the appeal. You are eating candy, folks. Why let real fruit remnants ruin it?

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Posted by ryanjsmith4 on Nov. 1, 2007 at 3:56 p.m. (report)

nice pull, Czabe. a creative angle, beautifully researched, and pretty spot on analysis. but i urge you to reconsider for UW... Chunky. you know. square. plodding. not very glamourous. exhibit A: P.J. Hill. and don't forget top draft picks Joe Thomas and Ron Dayne.

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Posted by FoxPointTeen on Oct. 31, 2007 at 8:51 p.m. (report)

hey...you know...alot of these candies are good, despite what the author said about them. I realize, however, that candy is not the point here....and whats with Wisconsin being Twizzlers? Can't we at least be something CHOCOLATE!?

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