By OnMilwaukee Staff Writers   Published Jan 25, 2005 at 5:42 AM

Milwaukee is full of the fashion-forward and the fashion ass-backwards, from model-look-a-likes on Milwaukee Street to Zuba-wearers in 'Stallis. Yes, we have it all, but those in the public eye are -- naturally -- under more scrutiny, and consequently subject to our lighthearted ranking of the best and worst dressed in Milwaukee.

{image1} Best-dressed coach: Terry Porter, Milwaukee Bucks

Is it too much to ask that the coach of a professional sports team dress professionally? Not if you talk to Bucks' skipper Terry Porter. He's always smartly clad in a three-button suit and tie, roaming the bench as if it were a fashion runaway.

His colors of choice tend to be olive, tan or dark gray, always with a powerful but never loud patterned tie.

A tall and lean man, this first-time coach exudes confidence with his choice of game-day wardrobe.

{image2} Worst-dressed coach: Mike Sherman, Green Bay Packers

Contrast that to freshly demoted Packers coach Mike Sherman, who's not only the worst-dressed Wisconsin sports coach, but possibly the tackiest dresser in the entire NFL. On a good day, Sherman and his unfortunate staff can be found grimacing on the sidelines donning an early '90s style sweatshirt. On a bad day, he's wearing a Hawaiian shirt that Don Knotts made famous on "Three's Company," complemented by a loose-fitting tan polyester pants. We're not talking retro style, either. We're talking Packers thrift store.

Here's a crazy idea: If Sherman wants his players to perform like those of the Packers' glory days, maybe he should dress a little more like St. Vince. Wouldn't it be nice to see Sherman in a classic suit and tie, and perhaps sporting a hat, too? And no, Coach Sherman, you can't get away with a short-sleeved shirt and tie. Save that look for detectives and airline pilots. You're the coach of a storied franchise, so please start dressing the part.

For Porter, at least he can claim that it's better to look good than to play good. He can only hope his swanky style inspires his players to overachieve. But for Sherman, who looks more like a pro bowler with a spare tire than a head coach in Titletown, he doesn't look good, and at least in the post-season, his team doesn't play very well, either.

{image3} Best-dressed media personality: Mike Gousha, WTMJ 4

With sharp and snappy-looking suits, Gousha never goes wrong. And the crisp, white freshly-ironed button-up shirt beneath makes his look a staple. His clean-cut, perfectly groomed appearance not only pleases the ladies, but gives the guys a prototype to follow.

When you look that good, forget touching TMJ 4. How about touching TMJ Gousha? Seriously, though, the experts say that the best local news personalities make a connection with their viewers, and Gousha's been a staple in this market forever. His top-notch wardrobe may be part of his longevity on the city's highest rated 10 p.m. newscast.

{image4} Worst-dressed media personality: Alison Gilman, FOX 6

Gilman's got a look all her own, and maybe it's one she should reconsider. Nothing against Allie; she's a great anchor and seems like a genuinely nice person. But we're rating style not substance. And rather than keeping with the times, she seems to be stuck in the early '90s with odd-colored and odd-fitting skirt and pants suits, not to mention the bulky, flashy jewelry that often accompanies her fashion "style." Simplicity is often the key, Gilman. But, in the end, her worst dressed nomination relies heavily on that football helmet hair she sports ... that poofy 'do is a don't. We kid because we love.

{image5} Best-dressed musician: Paul Cebar

Cebar has a fantastic collection of unique hats and jackets, all of which he wears casually yet stylishly. Most look like thrift store treasures discovered after hours of digging through junk, or the kind of cool finds only available after a death in the family.

Cebar is also one of the few guys who can pull off a full beard and a ponytail without looking tragically '90s. Cebar's style is Bohemian-sophisticated and almost always compliments his personality, music and intense, burn-a-hole-through-ya eyes.

Fine, he may never get airplay on mainstream radio. But those in the know, know Milwaukee's best-dressed musician when they see him.

{image6} Worst-dressed musician: Sigmund Snopek

Unlike Cebar, Siggy is no longer pulling off the long 'do, scraggly facial hair and knit hat. Again, we love this guy's music and his amazing creativity (he penned the OMC jingle back in 2000). But Sig, you need to take down the stringy mop to a clean buzz cut, shave that beard into, at most, a soul patch and wear something that doesn't look like it belongs at the bottom of a hamper.

That said, Milwaukee's most prolific and talented composer didn't get to where he is because of a haircut and a shave. Maybe he knows something we don't.

Best-dressed group of women: Milwaukee Bucks' wives

The Milwaukee Bucks wives, on the flip fashion side, bring the Badgley, Mischka and more to every game. The NBA is all about style -- sometimes over substance -- but the wives of the players are easily some of the most styling in town.

Desmond Mason's lovely wife is always dressed to the nines, and winter brings great hats from her and her friends.

Renata Kukoc, who is married to Toni Kukoc, owns the posh shoe boutique Stima Bleu in Highland Park, Ill. so watch her feet, as she's always on top of the latest shoe styles.

Worst-dressed group of women: Energee Dance Team

The OMC fashion police have nothing against the Milwaukee Bucks Energee Dance Team. They work hard, have added great creativity to their routines though the years and bring good energy, so to speak, to time-outs at the B.C. We do, though, take issue with their wardrobe.

Does everyone and everything have to shine and glimmer? Are brown pantyhose really required?

And sometimes, ladies, too tight can be too tight. Sorry. We love you, anyway.

Best-dressed fictitious Milwaukee character: Fonzie

Taking cues from the greaser of rockin' culture of the 1950s, Milwaukee's Arthur "Fonzie" Fonzarelli pulls off his style in a way that makes us nod "Aaaayyyy" with approval.

Fonzarelli, first of all, keeps his slick 'do under control. Beneath the black leather jacket, the Fonz keeps it simple and cool, with a white -- and sometimes a black -- T-shirt.

In the end, the Fonz is the epitome of thumbs-up cool -- in threads and in attitude; sort of an Eddie Cochrane for the ages.

Worst-dressed fictitious Milwaukee character: Squiggy

Unlike the Fonz, Andrew "Squiggy" Squigman should just pull off this style and go for something completely different; it's just not working for him. His jet-black hair is always a slimy mess.

He often opts for a dress shirt underneath the leather jacket and that could be an asset, if it wasn't always wrinkled and half-unbuttoned.

Let's fact it, Squiggy is, at best, a wannabe; a Fear to the Fonz's The Clash.