In Sports

Begel: what's hot and what's not in sports

There's a lot of stuff to like about sports. The competition. Gambling. Rooting. Underdogs. Television. Home teams.

But one of the best things about sports is how cool it can be.

A number of years ago, Supreme Court Justice Potter Stewart was asked to define pornography. "I can't define pornography," Stewart said, "but I know it when I see it."

The same could be said for cool. Tough to define but it's something you recognize when you see it.

With that thought in mind, and always looking for more suggestions, here some of the coolest, and not so cool, sports things.

Baseball players who leave the index finger outside of their glove are cool, players who jam all fingers into the glove are not cool.

Martina Navratilova is cool, Anna Kournikova is not cool.

Playing golf when it's raining is cool. Playing golf when it's below 40 degrees is not cool.

Donald Driver is cool. So is Mark Tauscher. Aaron Kampman is not cool and neither is Kabeer Gbaja-Giamila.

The Chicago Cubs are cool, the Chicago White Sox are not cool.

Football and golf are cool, soccer and tennis not cool.

Former UCLA Coach John Wooden is cool. Tom Crean, although a pretty good coach, is not cool.

Scoring a touchdown and casually flipping the ball to the referee is cool. Catching a three-yard pass to set up second and seven and shouting into the face of the defensive back who was guarding you is not cool.

LeBron James is very cool while Kobe Bryant is exceedingly uncool.

In post game interviews thanking your teammates before you thank God is cool. Thanking God without even mentioning your teammates is not cool at all.

Mia Hamm is cool. Her husband, Nomar Garciaparra is not cool.

Shaquille O'Neal didn't used to be cool, but as he has gotten older, he is becoming cool. Carmello Anthony will never be cool, no matter how old he gets.

Doug Flutie is cool, Deion Sanders is not cool.

The Miami Dolphins dancing cheerleaders are both hot and cool. The Milwaukee Bucks Energee Dance Team is neither hot nor cool.

Prince Fielder is cool and so is Jeff Cirillo. Damian Miller, although nice, is not cool.

Danica Patrick is cool when she's driving and at the track, and she's not cool when she's in men's magazines.

Mark Attannasio is cool. Herb Kohl is ... well ... Herb Kohl.

Dale Earnhardt, Jr. is cool, Matt Kenseth isn't cool.

Arnold Palmer was cool. Jack Nicklaus wasn't cool. Now both of them are pretty cool. The same thing can be said of John McEnroe who was cool and Jimmy Connors who wasn't. Both of them are now cool.

Michael Jordan playing basketball was cool. Michael Jordan hawking products was not cool.

Vince Lombardi was cool. Vince Lombardi Jr. is not cool.

Golf broadcaster Johnny Miller is cool. Golf broadcaster Gary McCord is not cool.

Ernie Banks and Reggie Jackson are cool but Johnny Bench isn't cool.

At the end of a fast break, dunking with one hand is cool. Doing a reverse, two-handed dunk at the end of a fast break is not cool.

Muhammad Ali is about the coolest. George Foreman is about the un-coolest.

Broadcaster Keith Jackson is cool and broadcaster Billy Packer is not cool.

Peggy Fleming and Dorothy Hammil are cool, while Nancy Kerrigan and Tara Lipinski are not cool.

NASCAR is cool. Hockey is not cool.

Greco-Roman wrestler Rulon Gardner is cool. Hulk Hogan is not.

Finally, and perhaps most obvious of all, reading sports columns is very cool. Writing them isn't.

Talkbacks

OMCreader | May 16, 2006 at 3:49 p.m. (report)

stephanie said: nomar garciaparra is not cool? right cuz hes hot, look up the stats for him lately and then tell me hes "not cool"

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OMCreader | May 12, 2006 at 2:11 p.m. (report)

Dale Hanks said: Is this citizen reporting? Because if its not then I cannot imagine how an editor actually let this go through. This is some of the worst writing I have ever seen, right from the beginning. Its almost a joke.

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OMCreader | May 12, 2006 at 8:59 a.m. (report)

Ryan Rata said: This is one of the worst articles (and stupidest themes) I've ever wasted my time on. I'd like to meet Begel to see how 'cool' he is.

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OMCreader | May 11, 2006 at 4:40 p.m. (report)

WriterB said: You, Billy Packer and writing sports columns really have a lot in common.

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OMCreader | May 11, 2006 at 4:28 p.m. (report)

Steve said: This dude is a clown. I'd rather read more of Czabe's columns that I already heard verbatim on Bob and Brian. Maybe Begel should go back to wasting New York taxpayer money and breaking the law--at least it doesn't waste my time.

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