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"Motherfest" is an OnMilwaukee.com-exclusive column about parenting.

Motherfest: Astrology and the adopted child


Adoptive parents of internationally adopted children don't always have a lot of information about their kids' past, but we can find out as much as possible about who they are as individuals in other ways. I have enjoyed researching and reading about my son's astrological sign and used basic numerology to find out more about him.

I recognize this sounds New Age-y, and just the mention of astrology makes some folks roll their eyes and think of Nancy Reagan, but the bottom line for me is that astrology adds a dimension of identity to my son. And I repeat, it adds a dimension.

I recognize just because someone's a Capricorn doesn't mean they have all of the characteristics listed for that sign, but chances are, they have a few. There is usually an uncanny coincidence between an individual and their astrological information, but if nothing else, it makes for interesting conversation and food for thought.

When a person grows up with their biological family, they usually have a grasp of their ancestral history. Hence, they can say stuff like, "I am creative like my grandmother on my father's side." But many internationally adopted children do not have this foundation, so in their case, astrology is a window into personality.

Astrological information allows me -- and will allow me in the future once my son gets older -- to identify aspects of his inherent nature and talk with him about them. For example, my son can say, "I am a very proud person because it's my Leo nature."

If any of this makes sense to you, I have two recommendations to begin the journey of learning more about your child -- adopted or not -- via astrology and numerology. One is to buy the "The Secret Language of Birthdays" by Gary Goldschneider and Joost Elffers.

This book has a full description for every day of the year, so if your child's birthday is May 15, you can look up that date and read tons of information and characteristics that are usually associated with someone born on this day. I have found it to be quite accurate for all of my family members.

My second suggestion is to pull a free astrological chart from alabe.com. To obtain an accurate chart, you have to know the date and time of your child's birth. I actually have the time of my son's birth, but if you do not know the exact time your child was born, type in noon. Once you pull the chart, print it out, save it and read it once a year. The chart will contain some stuff that's accurate and some stuff that isn't, but chances are it will make more even more sense in the future.

If you want to take it a step further, you can pay to have a "full" chart created for your child, but be sure you research the business or individual pulling the chart before you pay them money. Sadly, a few kooky apples have spoiled the astrology barrel.

Let me tell you a little bit about my son, Kai, and his astrological information. Anyone who knows him and knows a thing or two about astrology is not surprised he is a Leo. Kai River is the King of the Jungle: a leader with a strong will and a load roar. He has hair down to the middle of his back that we refer to as his "mane." (My husband and I have tried to talk Kai into a haircut for almost a year, but he refuses to have it cut off. I know I could drag him to the salon or just chop it myself, but I really believe in trusting children when their safety is not at risk. Plus, the lion loves his mane, I guess.)

Once upon a time, I was skeptical of astrology, but then I started reading my own and was blown away by the accuracy of it. (I am Gemini through and through!) You won't find me blowing my family's grocery allowance at the next psychic fair, and I certainly don't subscribe to a lot of New Age dogma, but much of my astrological findings about Kai have been right on.

Aside from revealing aspects of my child's personality, astrology is just plain fun. My advice is to approach it lightly, see what you learn and refer back to the information down the road.

Talkbacks

azuredragon | Jan. 19, 2014 at 3:33 a.m. (report)

This is a WONDERFUL article! I will be following your work. Thank you.

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rniam | March 26, 2008 at 7:32 p.m. (report)

Is that a whistle I hear in the distance? I think the train to Crazy Town is leaving the station

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c.grace | March 24, 2008 at 11:23 p.m. (report)

Amen, sister! I am a totally down-to-earth person who took a long time to warm up to the truths of astrology.... and now that I have seen how absolutely real and illuminating astrology is as both an art and a science, I use it to understand many different people (not the least of which is myself). Another great resource for complete reports, including the comprehensive "Indra Report" of your personality based on Sun, Moon, Rising signs and other key indicators is: www.spiritualastrologyonline.com The report mentioned is about $20. Other reports (including karmic insight and past-life insight, romantic compatibility, etc.) are available there as well. I am a Christian who decided not to be weirded out by this stuff long ago and who now fully recognizes that three of the first people to find Jesus Christ upon his entry here on earth were astrologers. Their knowledge of this ancient tradition let them know that this great event was even happening -- though they lived hundreds of miles away -- and when, and where. Make sure you have date, time, and place of birth to get the most accurate reports.... Good luck in ever-deepening astrological understanding!

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wfbgal | March 24, 2008 at 10:19 p.m. (report)

My mom is adopted, although not an international one - there is always that wonder of "who am I". At Chistmas, as a young girl, she use to wander around Gimbels downtown looking at people wondering if they were related to her. Over time, she found her mother - although they met once, that was the end of the relationship. She just said over Easter that she still doesn't feel like a whole person - as she doesn't know the father. It is good that you are doing something for your son, so he can have an identity.

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