If you're looking for something witty in this space, you'd better stop reading now.
I have a serious case of writer's block this week, and the only way I know how to move past it is to write my way out of it.
Again, stop reading now, or you will be subjected to a blog posting even less coherent than usual.
Fine, don't say you haven't been warned.
It could be the impending malaise of months of dark days ahead, compounded with fall weather that's transitioning from crisp to cold. But what I really think is going on is that the usual two topics I follow, and thus, write way too much about, are totally dormant.
On this first day of November, there's no iPhone or Brewers news to read and react to.
What does that leave me to pontificate about? The Greek government and its effect on global markets? I'll pass. A Polish plane that landed on its belly? Kinda neat, but I don't have too much to add. The undefeated, World Champion Packers? Too easy and too clichÃ©.
I could tell you about my progress exactly 10 weeks after back surgery, but first, that would interest no one other than my family, and second, it's not that remarkable (it still hurts, but maybe a little less).
I could talk about the release tomorrow of the first trailer of the new Grand Theft Auto 5 game, of which I'm extremely excited. But I, like everyone else, don't know anything about it.
I can't even blog about that burrito I had for lunch, because OnMilwaukee.com Dining Month just ended, and the burrito wasn't that, exciting, anyway.
But, since you apparently made it this far into the worst, most boring blog I've written since "The wettest I have even been in my whole life," here are at least a few bullet points that you can discuss or react to on your own. Put me out of my misery and comment using the Talkbacks below:
- Herman Cain's commercial with a smoking Mark Block is insane.
- Jon Huntsman's daughters' parody of said commercial kinda cool.
- Why must I wait what feels like five years between seasons of "Mad Man?"
- What am I supposed to do with the dozens of LinkedIn requests I get from strangers every week?
- Everyone says the Brewers can't afford Prince Fielder, but does anyone know the net worth of Mark Attanasio? I have no reason to believe or not believe celebritynetworth.com, but if he's worth $700 million, how do we know he can't afford him?
- How long until Tony La Russa emerges to manage the Cubs? I say two years.
Anyway, I'm sincerely sorry you chose to read this. I promise my next blog won't suck quite so much. Can I interest you in some dancing hamsters?
2 comments about this article.
Post your comment/review now
Disclaimer: Please note that Facebook comments are posted through Facebook and cannot be approved, edited or declined by OnMilwaukee.com. The opinions expressed in Facebook comments do not necessarily reflect those of OnMilwaukee.com or its staff.
Recent Articles & Blogs by Andy Tarnoff
Published Jan. 6, 2015
I remember back in college, I came to the realization that several different versions existed of me. Those different versions of me continue to this day, but nowhere are they more pronounced than on social media. I embraced Twitter long before Facebook and Instagram, but now active on all three, you'll experience a totally different Andy Tarnoff if you only look in one place.
Published Dec. 30, 2014
These year-end lists are always fun to write, because they are so open-ended. So bear with me if I skip the regular categories and think outside the box a little for this one.
Published Dec. 29, 2014
As you can imagine, it's not easy being a four-season bike shop in a state where it's possible to see snow on the ground for eight months out of the year. But Steve Whitford, co-owner of South Shore Cyclery in Cudahy, says he knows no other way.
Published Dec. 22, 2014
I remember vividly how hard school was. Not just the homework, but the routine of waking up early, navigating its social intricacies. Granted, my daughter is only in K5, but still, she works hard - so I like to reward her with plenty of family fun when seasonal school vacations come around.
Published Dec. 17, 2014
Yesterday, I walked around Packard Avenue in Cudahy for the first time in a long time. I mean, I drive through or around Cudahy all the time, but yesterday was different. I stopped to smell the roses. Every real Milwaukeeans should pay a visit to downtown Cudahy every now and then. It's like a window into our past, and it's still alive and kicking today.
Published Dec. 11, 2014
We all had a good laugh when the word spilled that Scott Walker substituted "Molotov" for "Mazel Tov" in his Hanukkah letter to Frank Gimbel. But you know that Gov. Walker didn't write that letter, right? He didn't even sign it.
Published Dec. 2, 2014
Black Friday and Cyber Monday were good fun, but Giving Tuesday is all about giving back to our community. It's a relatively new concept, but several Milwaukee nonprofits participate, including Discovery World, UPAF and Pathfinders. One local organization, Penfield Children's Center, is making Giving Tuesday work through crowdsourcing.
Published Dec. 1, 2014
I'm going to beat the Milwaukee winter. I will not be cold again. I will laugh in the face of Snowmageddon. I will be toasty warm when the temperatures drop well below zero. Here's how.
Published Nov. 18, 2014
Take it for what its worth, but Playboy Magazine has Blue's Egg as one of its 101 best breakfasts in America (don't worry, the link is reasonably safe for work). The restaurant at 317 N. 76th St. came in 21st place out of 23 Midwest selections, just behind Mickie's Dairy Bar in Madison.
Published Nov. 11, 2014
Can you imagine how social media would've melted down exactly 101 years ago? Nov. 11, 2013 was the end of the "Big Blow," the "Freshwater Fury" or the "White Hurricane," a hurricane-force blizzard that killed more than 250 people and and destroyed 19 ships.