Welp, there's always next year.
One imagines that's been a popular catchphrase around the grills at Miller Park tailgates this season. We all knew it was coming. Going in, we heard this was the start of a burn-it-to-the-ground-and-salt-the-earth rebuild, meaning a rough year of seeing familiar faces leave, unfamiliar faces play every day and watching growing pains in real time. And though it wasn't Jerry Royster-level catastrophic, it did not fail to live down to those expectations.
But good news, Brewers fans: Today, Major League Baseball released its season schedules for 2017. And while the image below may look merely like a color-coded collection of dates, times and teams, it is actually something more: a light at the end of the tunnel.
Here's what's on tap for the 2017 Brew Crew:
Some highlights from looking at that slate of games, other than just simply the fact that it's not the 2016 season?
April 3-6, vs. Colorado Rockies
The Brewers open at home next year, and better yet, it's a laid-back out-of-division game against a mediocre Rockies team. Best of all, it's on a Monday afternoon, meaning there's something to look forward to while heading back to work to start another week of driving through the slushy remains from that inevitable last freakish snowfall.
April 7-9, vs. Chicago Cubs
We've always held it as a secret shame that Miller Park becomes Wrigley Field North when the Cubs come to town, but this year, that shame got exposed quite loudly – in a New York Times piece, an ensuing nationally televised game featuring more lusty cheers than boos when the away team scored a run (and they scored many of them) and when the Brewers invited a retiring Bears player to throw out the first pitch. But whatever! 2017 is a new year, so let's show the world we do actually show up, and let's make sure to mock the hell out of the Cubs for taking its best team to the playoffs and promptly losing (we hope).
April 20-23, vs. St. Louis Cardinals
The Cardinals' first visit to town, aka that time of year when you look at their lineup, think to yourself, "Huh, this might finally be an off year for the Redbirds," watch the Brewers get punted into the atmosphere for four straight games, realize the futility of hope and then place a bet on St. Louis going to the playoffs yet again. Those monsters.
May 9-11, vs. Boston Red Sox
The Brewers' interleague schedule for 2017 matches them up with the American League East, meaning they'll have some rare face-offs against the Yankees, Blue Jays, Rays, Red Sox and Orioles (in addition to our annual tiffs with the Minnesota Twins). Very rare, in the case of the Red Sox. When Boston comes to town in early May, it'll be the first time the Formerly Cursed Bambinos will play in Milwaukee since 2003. That series ended with a 9-1 loss to the Red Sox, with starting pitcher Glendon Rusch getting the loss for the Brew Crew and the wily Keith Ginter playing second base. Related question: What's a Keith Ginter?
May 14, vs. New York Mets
Celebrate Mother's Day with the Mets. I know one architecture-loving managing editor of a local arts and entertainment website who most certainly will!
June 2-4, vs. Los Angeles Dodgers
The Brewers and the Dodgers keep making deviously flirty eyes at one another concerning a Ryan Braun trade. So if that trade goes through, this will be Braun's first visit to Miller Park in anything other than a Brewers jersey. That emotional confusion you currently feel is normal and to be expected.
June 18, vs. San Diego Padres
In the most terrific of coincidences, celebrate Father's Day with the Padres at Miller Park. Everybody should have to play the Padres on Father's Day.
Aug. 9-10, vs. Minnesota Twins
The Brewers and Twins will continue what must be one of the limpest rivalries in all of professional baseball with this two-game August stint at Miller Park (preceded by two games at the Twins' lovely Target Field). Man, one of our all-time great players even manages the Twins, and there's no heat here. At least it's better than Rays-Marlins, I guess.
Sept. 21-24, vs. Chicago Cubs
One last chance to show up, represent the city accordingly and mock the Cubs before they almost certainly make the playoffs again and probably go to a second straight World Series. Boo. The Cubs and their fans are a lot less fun when they're not miserable.
Sept. 26-28, vs. Cincinnati Reds
The Brewers will play the Cincinnati Reds to close out the 2017 home campaign ... unless, of course, they make the playoffs! Hey, it's next season; anything could happen then!
On the nitty-gritty side of the schedule, new next year will be 6:40 p.m. starts for Monday and Tuesday home night games. Evening rows on Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays, however, will start at 7:10 p.m.
So that's what to look forward to next year, Brewers fans. Also: more winning! Hopefully. For now, let's imagine that'll be the case, rather than a second year of a probably long and methodical rebuilding process. After all, that's the best part of next season: It hasn't started disappointing you yet.
All game dates and times are subject to change, and road game times will be announced at a later date.
As much as it is a gigantic cliché to say that one has always had a passion for film, Matt Mueller has always had a passion for film. Whether it was bringing in the latest movie reviews for his first grade show-and-tell or writing film reviews for the St. Norbert College Times as a high school student, Matt is way too obsessed with movies for his own good.
When he's not writing about the latest blockbuster or talking much too glowingly about "Piranha 3D," Matt can probably be found watching literally any sport (minus cricket) or working at - get this - a local movie theater. Or watching a movie. Yeah, he's probably watching a movie.