By Matt Mueller Culture Editor Published Jul 18, 2017 at 1:56 AM

They say there's no such thing as bad press, but after the past season of controversy – whether it's Lee's racism, the "Bachelor in Paradise" debacle or Dean's hometown date last night – I have to wonder if it's all been worth it for ABC (spoiler alert: it hasn't). 

It's especially a shame because, with or without the trip to Dean's father's house, last night hometown dates on "The Bachelorette" were some of the most emotionally honest and diverse the show has seen. It made for an interesting and unique two hours of television – even when the actual dates weren't much to write home about.

Rachel heads over to Baltimore for the first of the bunch, meeting Eric's family – the first time he's ever brought somebody home to meet his folks. They start easy enough with some one-on-one basketball (Rachel's got a sweet jumper from the top of the key) and move onto meeting Eric's cousin, Ralph, who talks up Eric very well. Eric rewards this by interrupting their conversation to kiss Rachel, and Ralph's all, "OH, OK! GOOD FOR YOU! I'LL LEAVE NOW!" It's a little awkward – but then again, the bar for awkward's pretty high this week.

After scaring Ralph off, Rachel and Eric talk more about his family life before we actually meet the whole clan – and they are an enchantment. They all chair dance together when Eric talks about his first meeting with Rachel. His Aunt Verna is the best, having the most relaxed and real conversation with Rachel about how she's coping with being the first black Bachelorette. Eric's sit-down with his somewhat estranged father, talking about how Rachel's strict childhood was much different from his, is emotional but modestly so as the two calmly talk out things. 

It all goes great – almost boringly great, but great all the same. You could almost even call it a normal date – minus the cameras and the nationwide audience judging and live-tweeting everything. At the end, Eric tells Rachel he's falling in love with her – but then very carefully explains what he means by love, which somewhat weirds Rachel out. Overall, though, Eric's hometown goes fine.

Rachel then bounces from Baltimore to Miami, where she meets up with Bryan and MY GOD, HOW ARE THEIR KISSES SO LOUD. I don't know who the boom mic operator is on this show, but if we ever meet, WE ARE GOING TO HAVE WORDS. Seriously, every week it's like two suction cups bathing in jelly, and I hate my ears. Luckily, they stop making out because Bryan's heard Rachel likes dominoes, so we get a very charming scene of the two playing dominoes in the park with some old Miami men.

After their domino duels, the two pop over to his family's house, where we meet most of the family – though the star is Bryan's mom. Apparently, she was a big reason for his last relationship falling apart, and for the first few conversations at the place, she's as domineering as sold. She sure as hell is NOT convinced about finding love on "The Bachelorette," telling Bryan that she finds it peculiar that he's dated all these women in the past and then apparently finds love on a friggin' TV show. Agreed, Bryan's mom; it's weird.

Still, after things settle, she wraps up her convo with Bryan sweetly, and her conversation with Rachel is less crazy mom and more just protective mom – except for the part at the end where she warns Rachel that if she makes her son unhappy, she will kill her. Rachel laughs a little too hard and manages to avoid slowly inching out of the room for her safety. Other than that, though, another fine date. 

After surviving that (for now ...), it's off to Madison – WOO! – for Peter. And I hate to say this about our silver fox, but the dude was real awkward this week. The two meander around Madison's farmer's market before popping into a very cool bar – and emptying out an endless clown car of friends for Rachel to meet. If I was Rachel, I'd be real uncomfortable – but Rachel is better than me and handles it with grace.

While Rachel chats offscreen with his lady friends, Peter talks with his bros at the bar, where he bores his dudes into silence about wanting to be one hundred percent sure about his feelings if he's going to propose. They seem profoundly bored – fair; this was not the most interesting hometown – but at least he gets this essential advice: "Don't f*ck it up." 

Peter does much better at home with his family, being all handsome and cute with his little niece – which Rachel is all about because Rachel wants babies NOW. ALL THE BABIES, ALL THE MARRIAGE, ASAP. That's going to be a problem with Peter, however – so much so, even his mom is like, "Ehhhh, good luck with that!" She notes that he's more likely to commit to having kids than getting married, and Rachel's concerned. Also concerning: He doesn't say the L-word at all on the date, and doesn't really get close. I still think this is more manufactured drama than real drama – but still, tense times for any Peter fans out there. 

That brings us to Dean and his father in Aspen – but first, ATVs! Dean gets two off-roaders ready; Rachel normally just rides, but Dean's like, "TOO BAD!" (but, like, cute and charming-like).

Unfortunately, they can't ATV all day though. Eventually, they have to meet his father, who is now a Kundalini Yogi Sikh convert by the name of Paramroop Singh Khalsa. They enter the house, and actually, for a while, things are OK. Rachel and Dean sit on the floor and participate in a kind of group energy cleanse complete with a VERY hypnotic mini-gong that thing cured all my stress for ten seconds. Dean's father then introduces his new wife and pays tribute to Dean's tragically deceased mother. For all the talk of Dean's father being "eccentric," he's actually somewhat sweet – and, once again, adds to the extremely diverse variety of perspectives on these hometowns. 

However, things don't stay nice for long.

While Rachel talks with Dean's sister, Dean and his dad get into it. REALLY into it – to a level perhaps too intense for a dumb dating show like "The Bachelorette." For what seemed like ten uninterrupted minutes, the episode had nothing to do with finding love and instead focused entirely on what seems to be a deeply broken and hurt father/son relationship. After the two angrily go their separate ways, Rachel tries to talk with Dean's dad, but that lasts all of about four words before he can't continue and leaves. 

On one hand, this sequence featured some of the most intense, real conversations I've seen on the show, clearly actual emotional drama at play rather than the usual pre-packaged fake "drama" or "insight" the program traffics. On the other hand, though, I can definitely see how people felt uneasy watching a TV show essentially exploit a clearly troubled relationship for drama – especially the way they previewed it, selling it on "watch a quirky father and son fall apart and duke it out." It's the great conundrum of reality television: It's supposed to be real but not too real. 

For those who found Dean's hometown exploitative, the fact that he was sent home barely 20 minutes later at the rose ceremony didn't help convince that he was merely kept around for some "juicy" father/son fighting footage. Dean's confused and angry that Rachel said she was falling in love with him back his father's house (and she did! Check the tape ... yep!), and Rachel says she was. It's a complicated, nuanced emotional reaction – to know you love somebody but also that maybe now isn't the right time, especially with all of the major things Rachel clearly wants from a relationship.

But "The Bachelorette" isn't really great at the whole nuance thing – at least, that's definitely what I took away from their marketing strategy for "Bachelor in Paradise." It seems profoundly icky to sell a show on the premise of "PHEW! Thank god those sexual misconduct charges blew over, amirite?!" To use "We dodged sexual assault rumors" as a dramatic selling point is a major miscalculation – and just one more controversy to throw onto this season's ever-growing pile, for better or worse. And judging by the ratings and reactions, it might be the latter.

Gone

Dean. Yes, he was a little young and immature for Rachel. But the show could've done by him better. Maybe save the rose ceremony for next week so he doesn't have his family's laundry aired out, then get immediately stabbed in the heart in the same half-hour? I know there was a lot of Twitter chatter about making him the next Bachelor – but do you really want to see what the show does with round two with his family? 

Contenders

1. Peter 

Listen, "The Bachelorette," I'VE SEEN THIS STORY. It was named Vanessa, and it happened less than a year ago. Peter's been an obvious pick this whole season, so in the name of spicy drama, you emphasize that maybe he's not ready. I SEE YOUR GAMES. 

2. Bryan

He's just too obvious and too smooth. I don't like it – almost as much as I don't like his Hoover vacuum underwater slurping sounds while kissing. 

Pretenders

1. Eric

I often find myself forgetting that Eric's on the show, which doesn't make for a good impression on Rachel I imagine and – most importantly – doesn't make for a good winner for ABC. I'd rather see him stay than Bryan – I think he's more genuine – but I think he's the least of the three. Bummer; I want more of those dance moves with the family. 

Oh hey, Wisconsin!

WE'RE IN MADISON! And not only that, but really cool-looking Madison! Instead of the trite stereotypes, Peter and Rachel did a bunch of trendy stuff in our state's capital. Contemporary art! Farmers markets! A warm-looking bar! NOT A SINGLE COW SHOT OR CHEESEHEAD!? It's like I barely know you, Very Silly Dating Television Show.

Line of the night

We'll give credit to Eric's cousin Ralph for his "Oh, OK!" response to Eric's surprise makeout session on the basketball court. 

Mom-mentary

Due to some freak electrical outages, the Mueller family viewing party had to emergency relocate to my sister's house. That's right, fate; you think you're going to keep us away from our terrible reality television? NOT TODAY!

Matt Mueller Culture Editor

As much as it is a gigantic cliché to say that one has always had a passion for film, Matt Mueller has always had a passion for film. Whether it was bringing in the latest movie reviews for his first grade show-and-tell or writing film reviews for the St. Norbert College Times as a high school student, Matt is way too obsessed with movies for his own good.

When he's not writing about the latest blockbuster or talking much too glowingly about "Piranha 3D," Matt can probably be found watching literally any sport (minus cricket) or working at - get this - a local movie theater. Or watching a movie. Yeah, he's probably watching a movie.