By Anne Reed Special to Published Mar 29, 2013 at 9:23 AM

Puppies. They sure are cute. But one major reason people get a puppy is completely mistaken.

I said it once. You might have said it. You have friends who have said it. "I want a puppy so I can raise it to be exactly the dog I want."

It’s not our fault we think it’s possible to raise the perfect dog. The publishing industry has been working overtime to make us think so. If you go to the category "dog training" at in March 2013, the first book on the list is Cesar Millan’s How To Raise The Perfect Dog. Other titles include Sophia Yin’s Perfect Puppy In 7 Days, Sam Walker’s How To Raise the Perfect Puppy, Paul Silas’s Raising The Perfect Puppy ... you get the idea. These authors represent many different philosophies of dog training but there’s one thing they all seem to agree on: if you raise a puppy right, you get a perfect dog.

I believed this until I got a puppy. I got a puppy because I wanted the perfect dog. I bought books whose philosophies I trusted and I did everything right. Socializing, loving, boundaries, everything.

I love my dog. He’s a better-behaved, happier dog because I did all those things. But he’s not a perfect dog. He’s sweet and nervous and jumpy and kind, great with other dogs and skeptical about new people. He turned out to be ... himself.

The "person" check

Nowadays, I use a little reality check when someone makes a claim about dogs: if I put "person" in the sentence in place of "dog," would it make sense? This doesn’t always work, of course, but it’s often helpful. "All dogs of X breed are (aggressive, smart, sweet)" makes no more sense than "All Irish people are (whatever)." "All dogs want dominance" makes no more sense than "All people want dominance." And "How to raise the perfect dog" makes no more sense than "How to raise the perfect child."

Don’t get me wrong. The early development of both dogs and children is very important. There are better ways and worse ways to raise both dogs and children, and the better ways are definitely better. But each dog, like each person, is different. Puppies aren’t Play-Doh®. They are individual creatures. You can affect their adult personality with good or bad choices, but you can’t shape it.

So get a puppy by all means. Get one because they’re cute, and sweet, and fun, and because getting up in the middle of the night and the challenge of training, socializing, nurturing, and creating baby albums for your pup sounds like a blast to you. If you get a puppy, please adopt a shelter or rescue puppy, but go for it. Just don’t get one because you want a perfect dog. Young dogs will change as they get older, and you can’t predict exactly how, even if you’re "perfect" with your training and interaction.

The real perfect dog

If you want a dog you’re sure is perfect for you, there is a way to find one. Get to know several adult dogs. With adult dogs, like the best adult people, what you see (once you get to know them) is what you get. There’s an adult dog out there who is perfect for you.

Where is that perfect adult dog? Here’s the beauty of it – he or she is at your local shelter or rescue. Right now, probably.

(Shakira, in the picture and at our Milwaukee Campus, is four years old. She might be perfect. Read more about her here.)

Anne Reed Special to

Anne Reed became the Executive Director of the Wisconsin Humane Society in January of 2010. Before joining WHS, Anne spent almost three decades as a corporate litigator at the Milwaukee law firm of Reinhart Boerner Van Deuren SC.

At the Wisconsin Humane Society (WHS), Anne stepped into the leadership of Wisconsin's oldest, largest and most recognized animal welfare organization. For more than 130 years, WHS has been saving the lives of animals in need, and carrying out its mission to build a community where people value animals and treat them with respect and kindness. WHS helped to pioneer the idea that every animal available for adoption in a shelter could be free of time limits, taking as long as needed to be adopted. WHS operates shelters in Milwaukee, Saukville and Racine.

Anne serves on the board of directors of the National Federation of Humane Societies (NFHS), Wisconsin Federated Humane Societies, and Shelter Animals Count, a national database initiative. She also chairs NFHS's 2020 Vision Initiative. Anne also served as president of Meta House's board of directors from 2005 to 2007 and served on the board from 2001 to 2010. As a lawyer, she was named one of the Wisconsin Law Journal's "Women In The Law;" was named to the list of "Wisconsin Superlawyers," and authored a law blog which was twice named one of the 100 best in the country by the American Bar Association's ABA Journal.