From now on, don’t expect a man hug from me. I’m done with them.
For a while, I thought that awkward "start with a hand clasp, then pull the guy in and slap his back" things was appropriate, but no more. They’re dumb.
If you’re a dude and you see me, it’s either a real hug, a handshake or a simple hello.
Actually, I kind of think handshakes are dumb, too, especially after you’ve already met someone. The first time is totally fine. But shaking hands when seeing someone after a few days or a few weeks – or if you’ve done something good – I don’t get it. (Doing "knuckles" is OK, but only because it’s so funny.)
If you’re worthy of shaking my hand, if you’re happy to see me, you’re worthy of a hug. Don’t worry, it’s not gay – and of course, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Men just seem to be surprised when I give them the same hugs that I give women, so I have to explain that I’m done with man hugs as I’m hugging said man.
What I don’t like about man hugs is they’re so pensive, so half-assed, so disingenuous.
Just hug it out. Or don’t.
Along those lines, we don’t need to touch every time we see each other. Whether we hug or shake or do nothing, it’s not a reflection of how much we like each other. Maybe I’m sweaty. Or maybe you had garlic for lunch. A simple smile and hello will do, too.
But if you want a hug, don’t go in for the man hug, because you’re going to get a real, sincere hug.
The man hug is dead to me.
Andy is the president, publisher and founder of OnMilwaukee. He returned to Milwaukee in 1996 after living on the East Coast for nine years, where he wrote for The Dallas Morning News Washington Bureau and worked in the White House Office of Communications. He was also Associate Editor of The GW Hatchet, his college newspaper at The George Washington University.
Before launching OnMilwaukee.com in 1998 at age 23, he worked in public relations for two Milwaukee firms, most of the time daydreaming about starting his own publication.
Hobbies include running when he finds the time, fixing the rust on his '75 MGB, mowing the lawn at his cottage in the Northwoods, and making an annual pilgrimage to Phoenix for Brewers Spring Training.
