Ever feel like there's a random national day for every single day of the year, hashtagging its way across Twitter and giving publications excuses to list things? (HI!) Well, that's because, according to the National Day Calendar website, there is – often times a solid handful of random celebrations packed into one 24-hour period.
Some of them make sense. National Double Cheeseburger Day on Sept. 15? Any excuse to nosh a burger is fine by me. National Beer Lover's Day on Sept. 7, as well as National Drink Beer Day on the 28th? The more beer-centric days, the better! National POW/MIA Recognition Day on Sept. 21? A noble cause if ever there was one. But some of them are just bonkers, either obviously fake creations or obvious evidence that the shady Illuminati society behind all these national days might have too much time on its hands.
Here are the ten weirdest days you can technically celebrate in the month of September.
National Another Look Unlimited Day
When: Sept. 4
The concept of National Another Look Unlimited Day isn't bad. After all, don't we all spend Labor Day looking around at our apartments or homes realizing that maybe we could do a fall cleaning and decluttering? (OK, I don't because I have the maturity of a 11-year-old, but that's not the holiday's fault.)
The goofy part of National Another Look Unlimited Day is ... well, that it's called National Another Look Unlimited Day. What's the word "unlimited" doing there? It sounds like a marketing expert threw it in there to appeal to The Youths or something. ("National Another Look EXTREME Day!") Or I actually first thought this day was meant as a tribute to The Limited. (Pours one out for The Limited.)
No matter the case, sorry, but I'm still not cleaning.
National Lazy Mom's Day
When: Sept. 7
National Lazy Mom's Day is dedicated to mothers and giving them a rest from any work – and better yet, it lands on National Beer Lover's Day. Yep, Mom's getting hammered today.
National Hug Your Hound Day
When: Sept. 9
I know I put this national holiday on this goofy list, but I don't actually have a problem with people who hug their dogs. Puppers are cute, little, fluffy pillows with legs; why would you NOT hug them? Oh, because dogs actually hate hugs? Because it stresses them out and makes them unhappy and want to escape? Well TOO BAD; YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN BORN SO ADORABLE!
Also, according to the official National Hug Your Hound Day description, the point of this holiday is not only to torture your doggo with cuddles but to also view the world from their point of view. And I think they mean it literally, so if you see people roaming the streets on all fours, they haven't lost their minds; they're just celebrating Hug Your Hound Day! (And also they've lost their minds.)
National TV Dinner Day
When: Sept. 10
This might be the saddest national holiday – and I say that as one whose lack of culinary skill means I participate in National TV Dinner Day every single night for supper. A plastic tray of mystery meat Salisbury steak, mashed potato paste and a brick of brownie is nothing to celebrate.
National Kids Take Over the Kitchen Day
When: Sept. 13
Or, as it's more commonly known, National Have Domino's On Standby Day.
National Eat a Hoagie Day
When: Sept. 14
If TV dinners can earn their own day, then hoagies – as well as their bready brethren: the sub, the torpedo, the hero and the grinder – deserve one too. However, why isn't it just National Hoagie Day? What else is one supposed to do with a hoagie? I look forward to January, when I assume there's a National Throw a Hoagie Day.
National Hug Your Boss Day
When: Sept. 15
September: a big month for awkward embraces, between Hug Your Hound Day and now National Hug Your Boss Day. On behalf of HR departments across the country, allow me to pass along some simple advice for celebrating this holiday: don't.
National Checkers/Dogs in Politics Day
When: Sept. 23
Ain't nothing in the rule book that says a dog can't run for governor! Unfortunately, this national holiday is not a day-long tribute to Senator Air Bud, but instead to Checkers, Richard Nixon's family dog who the then-candidate for vice president used as a bulletproof shield in a television address when word of a controversial reimbursement fund hit the news. The pupper reference ended up winning over the public, helping Nixon stay on the Republican ticket with Dwight Eisenhower and eventually become vice president that fall. And it was all uphill from there for Nixon's political career!
Math Storytelling Day
When: Sept. 25
The purpose of Math Storytelling Day is noble enough, attempting to get kids interested and excited about math with stories and games. But you could rewrite "The Lord of the Rings" with fractions and integers instead of hobbits and orcs, and we'd still dread math as much as six fears seven.
National Mud Pack Day
When: Sept. 30
National Mud Pack Day serves as a tribute to clay facials, making it the one day every year where you can cover your face in mud and not look a raving lunatic. OK, fine, also during Lollapalooza.
As much as it is a gigantic cliché to say that one has always had a passion for film, Matt Mueller has always had a passion for film. Whether it was bringing in the latest movie reviews for his first grade show-and-tell or writing film reviews for the St. Norbert College Times as a high school student, Matt is way too obsessed with movies for his own good.
When he's not writing about the latest blockbuster or talking much too glowingly about "Piranha 3D," Matt can probably be found watching literally any sport (minus cricket) or working at - get this - a local movie theater. Or watching a movie. Yeah, he's probably watching a movie.