By Drew Olson Special to OnMilwaukee.com Published Nov 25, 2006 at 5:45 AM
The term “Black Friday” took on a whole different meaning for Brewers fans this year.

Business writers and retailers use the phrase to refer to day after Thanksgiving, when throngs of shoppers wake up before dawn to make a mad dash to the stores. No doubt many Brewers fans in the throng ran right past the $9.99 DVD players and headed for the antacid aisle the moment they heard that Carlos Lee signed a $100 million contract with Houston.

That’s right -- $100 million.

Let that digest for a moment while you reach for another turkey-cranberry sandwich, the last piece of pumpkin pie and the Alka-Seltzer.

Plop, plop, fizz, fizz…

Carlos Lee, who turned down a four-year, $48 million offer from the Brewers last summer, became the second player this off-season and the 12th in baseball history to reach the century mark with a contract worth at least $100 million.

On an Astros team with future Hall of Famers Craig Biggio and Roger Clemens (who may or may not be back next season), Lee owns the richest contract in franchise history – by a lot. He gets a $3 million signing bonus, $11 million in 2007, $12 million in 2008 and $18.5 million in the four years after that. Lee now makes more than his new teammate, Lance Berkman, a Houston native and arguably superior player who signed a six-year, $85 million extension during spring training.

“All I can say is, I won’t disappoint you,” Lee told reporters at his press conference Friday. “Let’s go for the championship.”

After losing the 2005 World Series to Lee’s first club, the White Sox, Houston missed the playoffs last year in large part because it had the worst offense in the league. Astros general manager Tim Purpura wanted to change that this winter, so he inquired about signing Alfonso Soriano, who signed a eight-year, $136 million deal with division rival Chicago.

Lee was the next big bat on the market, and his agent, Adam Katz, found interest from Baltimore and Philadelphia in addition to Houston. The Astros, however, had a built-in advantage: in addition to a giant cattle ranch in Panama, Lee owns a smaller ranch outside Houston. (No doubt those cows will be living in luxury.)

Lee, a two-time all-star in Milwaukee, has been a productive player. He has hit at least 30 homers and driven in at least 99 runs in each of the past five seasons.

But, let’s get serious…

If you were starting a team today, would you rather have Albert Pujols or Carlos Lee? They both have $100 million contracts, but Pujols – who turns 27 in January -- is making his over seven years; Lee, who turns 31 in June gets his over six.

Lee is not good defensively (though he’ll be OK in Minute Maid Park with a small left field and speedster Willy Tavares as his neighbor in center). Lee is heavy, some say close to 270 pounds. Although he carries the weight well and hasn’t missed time due to injury, that could change over the next six years. It could also be a reason why his performance has dipped in the second half the past two seasons.

While the Astros were welcoming Lee and veteran right-hander Woody Williams (two years, $12.5 million), the Brewers found out that the object of their affection, 34-year-old centerfielder Dave Roberts, spurned their offer for San Francisco, where he can stay on the left coast and play for manager Bruce Bochy, who was his boss for the past two seasons in San Diego.

Plop, plop, fizz, fizz…

Getting blown out of the market for Carlos Lee is one thing, but what does it say about your situation when you can’t attract the likes of Dave Roberts?

With the winter meetings approaching next month in Florida, it’s pretty obvious that the Brewers will be dumpster diving for second- and third-tier free agents and trying to cobble together trades that improve the team and excite the fan base. An example came Saturday, when they peddled lefty Doug Davis and fading prospects Dave Krynzel and Dana Eveland to Arizona for catcher Johnny Estrada and pitchers Greg Aquino and Claudio Vargas.They may shell out for multiyear deals for Bill Hall or Chris Capuano, but that won’t quiet the masses for long. It’s not going to be an easy task and the screaming is going to intensify. You can almost hear it now:

“When are they going to compete?”

“Why don’t they ever sign anybody?”

“Why doesn’t Attanasio just sell the team if he can’t afford to pay market prices?”

Those are valid questions and you’re going to hear variations of them until opening day. The latest spike in player prices, compounded by more than two decades of Brewers ineptitude, will prompt some fans to give up. The rest, however, will continue to hold out hope that Ben Sheets and J.J. Hardy stay healthy, that Prince Fielder, Rickie Weeks and Ryan Braun live up to top-pick status and that the Brewers can capture some of the mojo that worked for the A’s, Twins and Marlins in recent years.

What else can a frustrated, small-market fan do? How about popping in an old VHS copy of the 1979 movie “Meatballs” and listening to counselor Tripper Harrison (Bill Murray) give a spirited pep talk to his overmatched campers:

"And even if we win, if we win, HAH! Even if we play so far above our heads that our noses bleed for a week to 10 days; even if God in Heaven above points his hand at our side of the field; even if every man, woman and child joined hands together and prayed for us to win, it just wouldn't matter because all the really good-looking girls would still go out with the guys from Mohawk because they've got all the money! It just doesn't matter if we win or if we lose. IT JUST DOESN'T MATTER!"

Somebody get the Brewers marketing department on the phone. I think we just found the perfect slogan for 2007.
Drew Olson Special to OnMilwaukee.com

Host of “The Drew Olson Show,” which airs 1-3 p.m. weekdays on The Big 902. Sidekick on “The Mike Heller Show,” airing weekdays on The Big 920 and a statewide network including stations in Madison, Appleton and Wausau. Co-author of Bill Schroeder’s “If These Walls Could Talk: Milwaukee Brewers” on Triumph Books. Co-host of “Big 12 Sports Saturday,” which airs Saturdays during football season on WISN-12. Former senior editor at OnMilwaukee.com. Former reporter at the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel.