By Colleen Jurkiewicz Reporter Published Jun 13, 2013 at 12:17 PM

Get to Confession, Milwaukee.

The folks over at real estate blog Movoto have come out with another list, this one ranking the cities of the nation based on their "sinfulness" relative to the Seven Deadly Sins (lust, pride, wrath, envy, greed, gluttony and sloth).

Apparently by these standards, Milwaukee comes in No. 5. 

Movoto analyzed data that included strip clubs per capita, number of cosmetic surgeons, violent crime, theft, amount of charitable giving, obesity and level of residents’ physical activity.

If you think Vegas, Sin City herself, came in No. 1, you’re wrong – it’s St. Louis, Mo., that godless, arched den of iniquity where apparently they also don’t like walking (they’re No. 3 in slothfulness) or respecting personal property (second in violent crimes per year).

As for Cream City: "The residents of Milwaukee will go to great lengths to avoid walking, raising the city's sloth ranking," it says on the website.

"For five of the seven ‘sins,’ Milwaukee ranked in the top 20th percentile," Randy Nelson of Movoto tells "For cosmetic surgeons it was 16th; for violent crime it was 18th; for theft it was 14th; for obesity it was 7th; and for inactivity it was 16th."

And we don’t like strippers that much, apparently – or philanthropy.

"Adult entertainment was pretty low; the city ranked 62nd for that, and about average (40th) in terms of money given to charity," Nelson adds.

I guess all I can say to that is: whatever. I simply don't agree. The majority of  Milwaukeeans I know are lovely, generous people who like beer and bike-riding, and your level of physical activity is just nobody’s damn business.

Also, I just want everyone to know that our designer Jason McDowell can bike to work faster than most of us can drive our cars. So there.

Colleen Jurkiewicz Reporter

Colleen Jurkiewicz is a Milwaukee native with a degree in English from the University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, and she loves having a job where she learns something new about the Cream City every day. Her previous incarnations have included stints as a waitress, a barista, a writing tutor, a medical transcriptionist, a freelance journalist, and now this lovely gig at the best online magazine in Milwaukee.