By Andy Tarnoff Publisher Published Dec 19, 2008 at 4:48 PM

I slept in a little this morning, since we already decided to make today an OnMilwaukee.com snow day. And considering the holiday party that our friends at Hi-Hat Garage generously threw us last night went a little late, I felt pretty rested when I finally rolled out of bed.

My morning shower was to be the only relaxing thing this day would have in store for me.

I mean, sure, I could've stayed inside for most of the day, though the impending task of shoveling and snowblowing my way out had me a little anxious. I decide to tackle my chunk of alley behind my garage, grab a quick bagel and coffee then get to work in earnest.

See, I've been getting a little cocky with the all-wheel drive transmission on my BMW. Up until now, it's felt like it's been glued to the road, even during snow and rain. Not only is it the best winter car I've ever driven, it doesn't even compare to my previous cars, which were largely worthless in Milwaukee winters.

I was feeling sporting this morning. And, after I cleared out my alley, I revved up the engine and attempted to blow through my neighbors' unshoveled section of road.

I made it perhaps 20 feet when I got stuck. Very stuck. Apparently, no amount of fancy German engineering will move a small car through a foot of snow sitting on top of a chunk of ice.

Rocking, revving and swearing didn't help, either. Two neighbors helped out, but even shoveling myself out had no effect. Eventually, with the help of some sand, I got the car moving. For another 20 feet.

This debacle continued for about an hour, when I finally dislodged myself out of the alley, now drenched in sweat. Ravenous and sore, I made my way to the Einstein Bagels on South 27th Street.

Of course it was closed.

I settled for a burrito and came home, but then I realized I had a new dilemma: where to park now? I immediately ruled out parking on the street, which was basically unplowed. I sized up the alley and decided I could either head up a hill or down a hill. By now, some of my neighbors had shoveled, but others had not.

With limited choices during this snow emergency, I knew this might not end well, but I had to try. Again, I revved up the BMW and coasted down the slope of the alley toward my garage.

I got close, too, just one garage away, when my car-sled stopped moving. Because my new neighbors don't use the alley, they didn't shovel during the last snowstorm, and I found myself again sitting atop a sheet of ice. Fortunately, they were shoveling this time, and a handful of neighbors and I spent the better part of an hour working to dislodge the car. Eventually, we dumped kitty litter behind all four wheels and I was free. It's really great when people you barely know jump in and help like that. I hope I can repay the favor -- just not today.

Mind you, I hadn't even began the snowblowing in the front and side of the house yet.

So now, here I am. Done shoveling and snowblowing, achy and tired, and certainly done driving for the day.

It turns out trying to get a cup of coffee after a blizzard isn't very sporting at all. It's just dumb.

Andy is the president, publisher and founder of OnMilwaukee. He returned to Milwaukee in 1996 after living on the East Coast for nine years, where he wrote for The Dallas Morning News Washington Bureau and worked in the White House Office of Communications. He was also Associate Editor of The GW Hatchet, his college newspaper at The George Washington University.

Before launching OnMilwaukee.com in 1998 at age 23, he worked in public relations for two Milwaukee firms, most of the time daydreaming about starting his own publication.

Hobbies include running when he finds the time, fixing the rust on his '75 MGB, mowing the lawn at his cottage in the Northwoods, and making an annual pilgrimage to Phoenix for Brewers Spring Training.